Pastor Sammy Aduama’s 3 rules for a successful marriage

Pastor Samuel Aduama is in charge of CCC, Western Region

Want your marriage to be successful? Learn from trained marriage counselors who also find themselves in amazing marriages. Pastor Samuel Aduama is one of such. He is the regional Pastor for the Western Regional branch of the Calvary Charismatic Center (CCC). These are his three big rules for a successful marriage:

1. Investigate your potential spouse:
Though the word “investigate” may sound a tad too harsh, it is what it is. Marriage is a lifelong journey. You don’t want to make discoveries on the way that may not only truncate the journey but leave you worse off. Be therefore sure to look into the family background, career, genetics, faith and behavioural traits of your partner’s parents. These will give you an insight into what awaits you in the marriage.

In Ghana (and perhaps other African countries, tradition demands such thorough background check. How wise the traditions of our fathers. Unfortunately, many traditions like this have been jettisoned in the dean of modernity. It’s important you investigate the mindsets, traits, ideologies that has moulded your partner since these things are easily transferred from parents to children. In many instances, strong ties between father and son, or mother and daughter, may visit some powerful undesirable behaviors into the marriage.

Be sure to know your differences since any difference is a recipe for conflict and therefore needs to be managed well.

2. Set Ground rules:
In other to get the most out of your marriage, it is important that both spouses sit and agree on some basic rules. These rules may differ from couple to couple depending on a number of factors including your mutual expectation for the family. These rules should cover finances, relationships,  children, sex etc.

3. Have regular and frank communication :
A lot of shocks can be avoided by sitting each other down to dispassionately discuss issues. These issues may concern only one spouse, both spouses or the entire family. Whatever it is, issues should be raised as the complainant sees them so that a workable solution can be attained. These discussions can also be an avenue to praise a partner who is doing very well in an area.

Never assume anything. Always probe, get evidence and validate it. Marriage in itself is full of surprises, you don’t want extra shocks and scandals.

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